Ten-Foot Rule
by Jumi
Summary: Vegeta goes on a rampage at a local Wal*Mart. Whee!


Ten Foot Rule

Vegeta Vs. Wal*Mart  
by  
Robert Silvers

Vegeta walked into the large store suspiciously. He hated going to the store, and detested it when Bulma practically demanded he buy groceries. He was the prince of the Saiyans! He didn't want to buy groceries! He wanted to train! He wanted to surpass Kakarott and become the greatest Saiyan of all time. He did not want to buy groceries. 

Upon walking into the store, he was greeted by an elderly female, obviously the door greeter. He snubbed her. He didn't have time to talk to humans. His only concern was getting out of here as soon as possible. He had already decided that the "groceries" he would buy would be something small and easy to carry, maybe a bag of chips or some canned soup. He didn't have time to buy steaks and whatnot. Besides, if he wanted meat, he would go out and kill it. 

Vegeta walked down the aisle as people stared. He really could care less what they thought, so he paid them no mind. Once he got to the grocery section, he walked through the aisles trying to find what he wanted. 

"Damn this store! Why is it so big? I just want a can of soup!" he cursed to himself. 

"May I help you?" an employee asked. 

"No!" Vegeta snapped. 

"But, I'd really like to help, sir," the employee continued. 

"I don't need help!" Vegeta replied, getting annoyed. 

"Yes, you do!" the employee replied. "As a matter of fact, you'll need a lot of help when we're done with you!" 

"The hell?" Vegeta said. "What is this? What's going on?" 

"Bwa ha ha!!!" the employee cackled as he tranformed into a gigantic monster with four arms, horns, and a tail. 

Vegeta was a bit surprised at this, but then he just grinned and put on his scouter. He smirked. 

"Ha! 30,000... your power level is weak. You cannot defeat me!" Vegeta said as he grinned out of the left side of his mouth. 

"Fool!" the monster/employee said before lunging at Vegeta. Vegeta dodged then delivered a smashing blow to the beast's kidney. 

"Ugh!" it moaned in pain. Vegeta smashed a hammer-like blow to its back, then kneed it in the gut. It continued to grunt and moan in agony. 

"You can never defeat me!" it finally said. 

"Heh. That's just what I'm doing. You're so pathetic," Vegeta said. "Even a third-class Saiyan could defeat you." 

"Aarrgghhh!" the monster yelled and again lunged at Vegeta, who once again calmly dodged and punched the beast in the gut. 

"Enough of this foolishness," Vegeta said, growing tired of his game. "Time for you to go..." he said as he knocked the monster to the floor. The beast lay unmoving. 

"TO THE NEXT DIMENSION!" he screamed as he blasted the monster to cinders. With a slight wind from the indoor fans, nothing was left. 

"You... you killed my employee!" a voice said. Vegeta turned and saw what was quite obviously the manager and several employees. "Get... get him!" 

Several employees morphed into beasts not unlike the one Vegeta killed, and rushed at Vegeta. He began dodging punches left and right from the four beasts, while simultaneously using punches of his own. When he felt he had warmed up on them enough, he jumped back and flew towards the ceiling, checking his scouter. 

"Hmm... 30,000, 32,000, 35,000, and 37,000. They are weak," he said to himself with a smirk. "You cannot defeat the prince of the Saiya-jins! Give up now!" 

"Never!" the manager called back. "Get him!" Upon this, the employees began throwing weak fireballs Vegeta easily dodged. Vegeta flew to the side and began charging, with flames engulfing his whole body. 

Quite suddenly, he fired Renzonku Energy Dan blasts at the monster/employees, blasting them all to the next dimension. 

"You... you killed them all..." the manager stuttered in disbelief. "You killed my employees..." 

Vegeta could have swore he heard someone on the other side of the store, most likely a kid, say, "You bastards!" but he ignored it. 

"Yes," Vegeta said to the demon, smirking, "And I'll do the same to you!" 

"Never!" the manager said, morphing to a beast not unlike the others, though obviously more powerful. "SAM WALTON TRANSFORMATION POWER! On behalf of greed, corruption, and capitalism, I WILL PUNISH YOU!" 

Vegeta looked at his scouter. "Hmm... 56,000... not a low power level," he thought to himself, "But still, I should be able to match it..." Vegeta grinned, savoring the victory he was sure was in his grasp. "You cannot defeat me," he said in a mocking tone. 

The manager looked angry. He pulled out a scouter of his own and checked it. "5,000?" he said aloud. "Ha! You are weak! I don't see how you managed to beat my employees, but you will never beat me!" 

The manager demon ran at Vegeta, kicking him and knocking him back several feet. Then the monster began rapidly punching at Vegeta's stomach. He looked up to see Vegeta's stern face. 

"Hurts, doesn't it?" he mocked. Vegeta cared little for his snide remarks. 

"No," Vegeta said calmly, simply, "Not at all. But it is pissing me off..." 

"What?" the manager said, as he continued to punch Vegeta in the stomach. Suddenly his scanner began going haywire. "What? 5,000... 10,000, 20,000, 35,000... what's wrong with this thing?" he said as he jumped back. 

"Heh heh heh..." Vegeta smirked. 

"55,000, 65,000, 80,000... the hell?" Suddenly, the scanner exploded. The monster squinted and winced. 

"Ahhhh..." Vegeta chanted, almost like a mantra. 

"What?!" the demon said in disbelief. 

"AAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!" Vegeta screamed, as fire encircled him and his hair turned from jet black to golden blonde. 

"WHAT IN THE HELL?!" the manager said in disbelief. "NO!" 

"Oh, yes!" Vegeta said as he rushed at the manager and punched him in the face, flooring him. Vegeta then dropped onto the monster's gut with his knee, knocking the breath out of him. Vegeta then began to pound on his stomach.. 

"Pathetic!" Vegeta smirked as he continued to pound away. Finally, he lifted the monster up, pitched him up into the air, and blasted him with a huge fireball. Then, as the monster fell to the ground, Vegeta punched him in the gut, or rather, through the gut, then, with the other hand, punched him in the face. The monster fell to the ground. 

"Please..." he mumbled, "Spare... me... I can... help you... you could own a Wal*Mart..." 

"Hmph." Vegeta said, obviously not interested. "I could have this and any other Wal*Mart I choose. And don't bother begging for mercy. I'm not Kakarott." 

"No..." the monster begged, "Don't kill me! We could... be a team..." 

"I don't team up with losers," Vegeta said, "And you look to be the biggest loser of all." 

"NO!" the demon screamed as Vegeta powered up a chi blast. 

"Time to join your employees," Vegeta said, "IN ANOTHER DIMENSION!" With that, Vegeta blasted the limp body to dust. 

"Hmmm..." Vegeta thought, "This isn't enough. There could be more. This store is full of employees, and they could eventually become too powerful. Even that lady at the door could have been a monster like this. I have to take care of them so that they never trouble me again." 

Vegeta rushed out the door with super speed, knocking magazines and tabloids off the racks in the process. The lady at the door could barely say, "Thanks for shopping Wal*Mart," before Vegeta had stormed out. 

Moments later, Vegeta flew in the air just above the store. 

"I have to take care of this store NOW." Vegeta said, charging up, still in Super Saiya-jin. "GALLET GUN BLAST!" he screamed taking care not to send out a blast too powerful, lest he destroy the planet, and, more importantly, himself. The blast hit the store and the store blew up like a nuclear warhead, complete with mushroom cloud. Even the parking lot was engulfed. Finally, when the smoke cleared, there was a large crater several acres wide and long where a Wal*Mart had once been. Vegeta flew off toward home. 

* * * * *

"And just where have you been?" Bulma asked in the classic "nagging-wife" tone Vegeta was so used to. "And where are the groceries? Look at you! You're covered in dust!" 

Vegeta ignored her and casually made his way back to the gravity room to train. 

"Answer me!" Bulma asked impatiently. 

"Silence, woman!" Vegeta snapped. "That store was infested with Kami-knows-what, and besides, you know how much I hate going to the store." 

"Now I suppose _I'll_ have to go, won't I?" Bulma pestered. "Look at me. I'm not cleaned up, and I don't want to go to Wal*Mart." 

"You don't have to worry about going to Wal*Mart," Vegeta said casually. "You'd better go to K-Mart instead." 

"What?" Bulma asked. "Vegeta! What did you do?" 

Vegeta just grinned and stepped inside the gravity room, locking the door. 

THE END


End file.
